Post by ancient1 on Feb 4, 2008 11:44:19 GMT 12
CONFUCIUS SAYS :-
Man like baby - want to suck tit all day
Man who screw blender no longer man
Some men like guns - shoot blanks
Men who put cream in tart not always bakers
Man who walk in middle of road get hit by bus
Man who let woman on top is damning up
Woman who spend much time on bedspring may get offspring
Sex on beach is like American beer - damning near water
Man who masterbate only screwing himself
Schoolboy OK to masterbate as long as it's not against Principal
Schoolboy who mess around with schoolgirl during wrong period, get caught red handed
Wise man not play leapfrog with unicorn
Better to be pissed off than pissed on
Man who gets kicked in testicles left holding the bag
Man who kiss girl's behind get crack in face
Man who snatch kiss when young, kiss snatch when old
Girl who douche with vinegar walk around with sour puss
Girls should not marry basketball players because they always dribble before they shoot
He who damn tailpipe may burn rod
It take square ass to shit brick
Woman who dance while wearing a jock-strap have make-believe ballroom
A girls best asset is her liability (lie ability
Man who eat jelly-bean fart in technicolour
Man who marries a girl with no bust has a right to feel low down
Squirrel who runs up girls leg not find nuts
He who fishes in another mans pond will often catch crabs
Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters in own hands
Wash your face in morning , neck at night
Man who take woman on camping trip have one intent
He who refuses to listen is lying
When lady says no , she mean maybe
When lady says maybe, she mean yes
When lady says yes , she no lady
Woman who not practice sex before marriage is sentenced to an interminate length
He who sniffs coke drowns
Crowded lift smells different to midget
Man who screws near gravetard is damning near dead
Man who piss into wind get wet
Never eat yellow snow
Boy who play with himself pulls boner
Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons
Man who sleeps with old hen finds it's better than pullet
Man who outruns the cheetah is damning fast on his feet
Man who sitteth on upturned tack shall surely rise
Even the greatest of whales is helpless in the desert
The hand that turneth the knob opens the door
He who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger
Best way to prevent hangover is to stay drunk
Preserve wildlife-pickle a hedgehog
Passionate kiss like spiders web- soon lead to undoing of fly
Virginity like bubble - one prick - all gone
Foolish man give wife grand piano - wise man give wife upright organ
Man who walk through airport turnstyle sideways going to bangkok
Virgin with thimble on finger never feel prick
Man with one chopstick go hungry
Man who go to bed with diarrhea wake up in deep shit
Man who damn turkey eat stuffing
Man who damn ugly dog get howled at
Man trapped in sewer eat shit and die
Hockey player on ice have big stick
Man who go to McDonald's eat out stinky meat
Boy who diddle little girl do diddly squat
Man who lifts stones off woman gets rocks off
Man who get paid pick up chick
Penis put in vacuum cleaner get sucked off
Man who pull out too soon get hit in rear end
Man who eat pussy do lip service
Man who damn pig eat ham
Penticostal who pass get laid in church
Woman who turn back on lover get damned over
Woman who eat banana get cream in mouth
Priest with dick in snow like cold one before mass
Man trapped in whore-house get jerked around
Man with dick in peanutbutter is damning nuts
Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails
Man with tool in woman's mouth not necessarily a dentist
Man who paints on toilet door is a shithouse painter
Is good forgirl to meet boy in park,but better for boy to park meat in girl
Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time
Fool climb tree to get cherry - wise man spread limbs
Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money
Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock
Man who buy drowned cat must pay for stinking wet pussy
Man who meoms ate pussy
Man with hand in pocket is having a ball
Those who quote me are fools
Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk
Panties not best thing on earth - but next to it
Work to become not to aquire
Show off always shown up in show down
Put rooster in freezer to get stiff cock
Man with no legs bums around
Man who pull out to soon leave rubber
Baby illconceived in automatic car shiftless bastard
A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose
Find old man in dark - not hard
Confucius say too damning much
Man who smoke pot choke on handle
It is OK for shit to happen - shit will decompose
When in doubt,,wip it out
A man with his hands in pockets feel foolish,but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts
Woman who wear G-string , high on crack
War dosn't determine who's right - war determins who's left
Man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache
Girl who marry detective mustkiss dick
Girl who is wallflower at party is dandelion in bed
Girl who go to bachelor pad for snack get tit bit
Man have more hair on chest than woman but on the whole woman have more
Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy
Sailor who get discharged from navy leaves buddies behind
No difference between man and mouse - both end up in pussy
Woman is like jazz music - ¾ jazz time ¼ rag time
Wife who put husband in dog house soon find hm in cat house
Man who sleep in cathouse by day sleep in doghouse by night
Secretary only becomes permanemt fixture when screwed on desk
Man with hand in bush not necessarily trimming shrubs
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night
If you park don't drink , accidents cause people
Man with athletic fingers make broad jump
House without toilet is uncanny
Many men smoke , but Fu Manchu
He who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser
While others are inside sitting down , you will be outstanding
Is good to learn how to masterbate , may come in handy
Man who tell one too many light-bulb jokes soon burn out
It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it
Never raise hands to angry child - it leaves the groin exposed
Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot is unsanitary
Man who go out with flat chested womanfeel shallow
Man that have sex with hole in ground have piece on earth
Man who eat many prunes sit on tolet many moons
Man who bounce woman on bed spring this spring have offspring next spring
Woman with bleached blond hair have black hair by cracky
Man who masterbate into cash registr soon come into money
Wife for life is better than wife for strife
Man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink
Man who drive like hell sure to get there
Girl with little red bike peddle ass all over town
Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting pants on
Girl who slidesdown banister naked gets splinters by cracky
Rape no good, woman run faster withdress up than man can with pants down
Man who go to bed with sex on mind wake up with soloution in hand
Better to sleep with chicken than to choke it
All blonde not blonde by cracky
Man who sit on tack get point
Man who runs behind car gets exhausted
Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion
Man who lose key to girlfriends apartment get no new key
Woman who fly plane upside down have hairy crack up
Man who has woman on ground has piece on earth
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot
Man who fart in church sit in his own pew
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day
Man like baby - want to suck tit all day
Man who screw blender no longer man
Some men like guns - shoot blanks
Men who put cream in tart not always bakers
Man who walk in middle of road get hit by bus
Man who let woman on top is damning up
Woman who spend much time on bedspring may get offspring
Sex on beach is like American beer - damning near water
Man who masterbate only screwing himself
Schoolboy OK to masterbate as long as it's not against Principal
Schoolboy who mess around with schoolgirl during wrong period, get caught red handed
Wise man not play leapfrog with unicorn
Better to be pissed off than pissed on
Man who gets kicked in testicles left holding the bag
Man who kiss girl's behind get crack in face
Man who snatch kiss when young, kiss snatch when old
Girl who douche with vinegar walk around with sour puss
Girls should not marry basketball players because they always dribble before they shoot
He who damn tailpipe may burn rod
It take square ass to shit brick
Woman who dance while wearing a jock-strap have make-believe ballroom
A girls best asset is her liability (lie ability
Man who eat jelly-bean fart in technicolour
Man who marries a girl with no bust has a right to feel low down
Squirrel who runs up girls leg not find nuts
He who fishes in another mans pond will often catch crabs
Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters in own hands
Wash your face in morning , neck at night
Man who take woman on camping trip have one intent
He who refuses to listen is lying
When lady says no , she mean maybe
When lady says maybe, she mean yes
When lady says yes , she no lady
Woman who not practice sex before marriage is sentenced to an interminate length
He who sniffs coke drowns
Crowded lift smells different to midget
Man who screws near gravetard is damning near dead
Man who piss into wind get wet
Never eat yellow snow
Boy who play with himself pulls boner
Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons
Man who sleeps with old hen finds it's better than pullet
Man who outruns the cheetah is damning fast on his feet
Man who sitteth on upturned tack shall surely rise
Even the greatest of whales is helpless in the desert
The hand that turneth the knob opens the door
He who goes to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger
Best way to prevent hangover is to stay drunk
Preserve wildlife-pickle a hedgehog
Passionate kiss like spiders web- soon lead to undoing of fly
Virginity like bubble - one prick - all gone
Foolish man give wife grand piano - wise man give wife upright organ
Man who walk through airport turnstyle sideways going to bangkok
Virgin with thimble on finger never feel prick
Man with one chopstick go hungry
Man who go to bed with diarrhea wake up in deep shit
Man who damn turkey eat stuffing
Man who damn ugly dog get howled at
Man trapped in sewer eat shit and die
Hockey player on ice have big stick
Man who go to McDonald's eat out stinky meat
Boy who diddle little girl do diddly squat
Man who lifts stones off woman gets rocks off
Man who get paid pick up chick
Penis put in vacuum cleaner get sucked off
Man who pull out too soon get hit in rear end
Man who eat pussy do lip service
Man who damn pig eat ham
Penticostal who pass get laid in church
Woman who turn back on lover get damned over
Woman who eat banana get cream in mouth
Priest with dick in snow like cold one before mass
Man trapped in whore-house get jerked around
Man with dick in peanutbutter is damning nuts
Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails
Man with tool in woman's mouth not necessarily a dentist
Man who paints on toilet door is a shithouse painter
Is good forgirl to meet boy in park,but better for boy to park meat in girl
Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time
Fool climb tree to get cherry - wise man spread limbs
Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money
Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock
Man who buy drowned cat must pay for stinking wet pussy
Man who meoms ate pussy
Man with hand in pocket is having a ball
Those who quote me are fools
Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk
Panties not best thing on earth - but next to it
Work to become not to aquire
Show off always shown up in show down
Put rooster in freezer to get stiff cock
Man with no legs bums around
Man who pull out to soon leave rubber
Baby illconceived in automatic car shiftless bastard
A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose
Find old man in dark - not hard
Confucius say too damning much
Man who smoke pot choke on handle
It is OK for shit to happen - shit will decompose
When in doubt,,wip it out
A man with his hands in pockets feel foolish,but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts
Woman who wear G-string , high on crack
War dosn't determine who's right - war determins who's left
Man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache
Girl who marry detective mustkiss dick
Girl who is wallflower at party is dandelion in bed
Girl who go to bachelor pad for snack get tit bit
Man have more hair on chest than woman but on the whole woman have more
Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy
Sailor who get discharged from navy leaves buddies behind
No difference between man and mouse - both end up in pussy
Woman is like jazz music - ¾ jazz time ¼ rag time
Wife who put husband in dog house soon find hm in cat house
Man who sleep in cathouse by day sleep in doghouse by night
Secretary only becomes permanemt fixture when screwed on desk
Man with hand in bush not necessarily trimming shrubs
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night
If you park don't drink , accidents cause people
Man with athletic fingers make broad jump
House without toilet is uncanny
Many men smoke , but Fu Manchu
He who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser
While others are inside sitting down , you will be outstanding
Is good to learn how to masterbate , may come in handy
Man who tell one too many light-bulb jokes soon burn out
It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it
Never raise hands to angry child - it leaves the groin exposed
Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot is unsanitary
Man who go out with flat chested womanfeel shallow
Man that have sex with hole in ground have piece on earth
Man who eat many prunes sit on tolet many moons
Man who bounce woman on bed spring this spring have offspring next spring
Woman with bleached blond hair have black hair by cracky
Man who masterbate into cash registr soon come into money
Wife for life is better than wife for strife
Man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink
Man who drive like hell sure to get there
Girl with little red bike peddle ass all over town
Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting pants on
Girl who slidesdown banister naked gets splinters by cracky
Rape no good, woman run faster withdress up than man can with pants down
Man who go to bed with sex on mind wake up with soloution in hand
Better to sleep with chicken than to choke it
All blonde not blonde by cracky
Man who sit on tack get point
Man who runs behind car gets exhausted
Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion
Man who lose key to girlfriends apartment get no new key
Woman who fly plane upside down have hairy crack up
Man who has woman on ground has piece on earth
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot
Man who fart in church sit in his own pew
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day
Look for the positive in any negative situation!!!
