Don't Mess With Mummy

[spirit21]

One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher asks the class to go home and think of a story to be concluded with the moral of that story.
The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story.
Little Suzy raises her hand.
"My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market.
Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."
When the teacher asked for the moral of the story, Suzy replied, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."
Little Lucy went next.
"My dad owns a farm too.
Every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator.
Last weekend only eight of the 12 eggs hatched.";
Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story.
Lucy replied, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch."
Next up was little Johnny.
"My Mummy fought in the Vietnam war, and her plane was shot down over enemy territory.
She jumped out before it crashed but could only take a flash of whiskey, a machine gun and a machete.
On the way down, she drank the whiskey in case it broke.
Then she landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers.
She shot 70 with her machine gun, but then she ran out of bullets!
So she pulled out the machete and killed 20 more.
Then the blade on her machete broke, so she killed the last ten with her bare hands."
The teacher looked a little shocked.
After clearing her throat, she asked what possible moral there could be to this story.
"Well," Johnny replied, "Don't mess with Mummy when she's been drinking."